Delta Eta Pie: a sisterhood of los angelean food lovers: Week 5: Mexican

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: The Taco Bandits have struck again. On Thursday, November 2, 2006, between the hours of 8 and 10 p.m., five taco trucks and stands all located in the Palms neighbourhood of Los Angeles were attacked by the Taco Bandits, a group comprised of four mysterious women and one man. The Bandits were armed with inhuman appetites and a cache of beer. The Bandits are known for their modus operandi of stealthy movement, no-nonsense handywork and the leaving behind of substantial evidence at the scene of each crime, including detailed taco critiques and Poloroid photos documenting their work (see below).

They were last seen on the corner of Venice & Sepulveda, holding onto their stomachs and ducking into a silver getaway vehicle. A handsome bounty will be provided for anyone that provides information leading to their arrest or conviction.

Evidence recovered at the scene of the crime is reproduced below:

Exhibit A: Don Felix Meat Market
Washington Pl. & Sawtelle

Soft Tortilla Shells: stale, cold and bland.

Fillings: Carnitas was authentic; Pollo a bit salty but moist and nicely shredded; Lengua bland; Barbacoa did not taste like beef; Asada was chewy but had good flavor; Pastor was extremely overcooked and dry.

Perks: Small tables and chairs provided. Conjoining small grocery store sold a variety of snacks and a variety of quality beer at low prices (a big plus in our books).

THE SISTERHOOD AND GUEST MR. CHRIS HAVE DELIBERATED: 5 ROSES OUT OF 10.

Exhibit B:Tito's Tacos
Sepulveda & Washington

Hard Tortilla Shells: Extremely thick, rock hard, crunchy and difficult to bite into.

Fillings: "Meat blend" was a mushy shred and unidentifiable (beef, pork, chicken or "other stuff").

Other menu items: Chicken tamale was very skinny w/ bland corn meal and a small amount of "unidentifiable" filling; Nachos were hard, crunchy and stale; Guacamole was runny & tasted like green processed goop; Fresh (or so we think) tomato salsa was mild and the most consumable item on the menu.

Perks: Parking lot with several spaces; seating available.

Drawbacks: Wait after having placed order was unreasonably long; no choice in taco fillings.

THE SISTERHOOD AND GUEST MR. CHRIS HAVE DELIBERATED: 3 ROSES OUT OF 10.

Exhibit C: Garcia's Bros.
Venice & La Cienega

Soft Tortilla Shells: Warm and soft.

Fillings: Asada, Carnitas and Pollo were all fresh, tender, moist and well-seasoned. Green guacamole sauce was painfully spicy and had us all hopping (literally) and punching ourselves like maniacs for 5 minutes.

Perks: The spice probably killed any bacteria in the tacos not to mention clean our eyes, ears, noses and throat for a week (Note: it was even more effective than wasabe in clearing out the sinuses).

Drawbacks: WARNING!! EXTREMELY SPICY! This place is recommended only for masochists, individuals with damaged taste buds or individuals who would like to damage their taste buds.

THE SISTERHOOD AND GUEST MR. CHRIS HAVE DELIBERATED: 8 ROSES OUT OF 10.

Exhibit D: Rico's Tacos a.k.a. Royal Catering
Venice & Cattaraugus

Soft Tortilla Shells: Very fresh and soft.

Fillings: Carnitas, Asada and Lengua we

re deliciously moist and perfectly complimented by a rich and messy sauce brown sauce and fresh, crisp onion slices.

Perks: Tacos are piled high with lightly pickled onions.

Drawbacks: Potential for onion breath. Not recommended for a first date.

THE SISTERHOOD AND GUEST MR. CHRIS HAVE DELIBERATED: 7.5 ROSES OUT OF 10.

Exhibit E: Tacos Chatos
Venice & Sepulveda

Soft Tortilla Shells: Bland.

Fillings: Pollo good; Cabesa outstanding because it was not fatty nor grisly but still had deep beefy flavour; Carnitas above average. Something in the filling had an extra sour kick (or perhaps it was the lime).

Perks: Located next to a Baskin Robbins; 4 chairs available for seating; each taco served in an individual basket with a wedge of lime.

THE SISTERHOOD AND GUEST MR. CHRIS HAVE DELIBERATED: 7 ROSES OUT OF 10.

Glossary of Taco Terms